Comments for Moron Church of Latter-day Saints http://www.moronchurch.com/main Following the False Traditions of Our Fathers. Wed, 08 Sep 2010 17:45:13 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7.1 hourly 1 Comment on Moronic Magic Underwear by Angry Agnostic http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2009/04/magic-underwear/comment-page-1/#comment-168 Angry Agnostic Tue, 31 Aug 2010 12:48:35 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=237#comment-168 Holy hell! You blasphemers are freaking hilarious! I nearly pissed my non-golden underwear reading all the comments, except of course the UNFUNNY, UPTIGHT, LAURA WHO MUST HAVE HER GOLDEN UNDIES RAMMED TIGHT INTO HER HOLIER THAN THOU ASS. Wow all caps is angry. Holy hell! You blasphemers are freaking hilarious! I nearly pissed my non-golden underwear reading all the comments, except of course the UNFUNNY, UPTIGHT, LAURA WHO MUST HAVE HER GOLDEN UNDIES RAMMED TIGHT INTO HER HOLIER THAN THOU ASS. Wow all caps is angry.

]]> Comment on Mormons and Oral Sex by Suz http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/08/mormons-and-oral-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-161 Suz Mon, 23 Aug 2010 12:41:21 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=487#comment-161 That was so sick it had to be funny, right? ;) That was so sick it had to be funny, right? ;)

]]> Comment on New Church Manual Now Available by TracyCD http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/07/new-church-manual/comment-page-1/#comment-155 TracyCD Sat, 31 Jul 2010 02:00:14 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=475#comment-155 What if I'm Asian, female and masturbate? Will I become a homosexual male? Not the face! What if I’m Asian, female and masturbate? Will I become a homosexual male? Not the face!

]]> Comment on New Church Manual Now Available by Shirley Temple http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/07/new-church-manual/comment-page-1/#comment-151 Shirley Temple Mon, 26 Jul 2010 13:17:13 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=475#comment-151 All I need to follow the Brethren! Thanks All I need to follow the Brethren! Thanks

]]> Comment on New Church Manual Now Available by Tommy Monson http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/07/new-church-manual/comment-page-1/#comment-147 Tommy Monson Fri, 23 Jul 2010 20:30:06 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=475#comment-147 This is the shizzle but I have another great gig going for me so I can't directly endorse this. Be sure to check out my "Count Chocula" cereal at your local grocery store. This is the shizzle but I have another great gig going for me so I can’t directly endorse this. Be sure to check out my “Count Chocula” cereal at your local grocery store.

]]> Comment on Improving Home Teaching by Cliff the Wino http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/06/home-teaching/comment-page-1/#comment-143 Cliff the Wino Fri, 25 Jun 2010 18:00:10 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=467#comment-143 A friend from ExMormonForums suggested we missed an option: I think you may have missed one of the cookie-cutter companion sets. It is two males, one about 50 something and the other is in his 20s just starting his family. The older "companion" always wears a white shirt and tie and tends to have body odor and bad breath. His white shirt kind of has a yellowish hue to it and is usually wrinkled. He is a Dry Priest and has had numerous callings in the ward, and likes to remind you of them. He controls the discussion, cannot remember your kids names or what they are up to, and has to be reminded every visit, as he asks the same questions every month. The younger guy stays quiet but is asked to say the closing prayer. He doesn't always wear a white shirt and is uncomfortable during the entire visit while the older guy drones on. Sometimes the older guy lets the younger companion stumble through the lesson. Sometimes the older guy shows up without the younger companion because the younger guy couldn't be reached (actually he is avoiding the older guy). After a few months, there has been a change in companions, and the older guy shows up with a different newly wed companion who has just moved into the ward. Rinse and repeat. A friend from ExMormonForums suggested we missed an option:

I think you may have missed one of the cookie-cutter companion sets. It is two males, one about 50 something and the other is in his 20s just starting his family. The older “companion” always wears a white shirt and tie and tends to have body odor and bad breath. His white shirt kind of has a yellowish hue to it and is usually wrinkled. He is a Dry Priest and has had numerous callings in the ward, and likes to remind you of them. He controls the discussion, cannot remember your kids names or what they are up to, and has to be reminded every visit, as he asks the same questions every month. The younger guy stays quiet but is asked to say the closing prayer. He doesn’t always wear a white shirt and is uncomfortable during the entire visit while the older guy drones on. Sometimes the older guy lets the younger companion stumble through the lesson. Sometimes the older guy shows up without the younger companion because the younger guy couldn’t be reached (actually he is avoiding the older guy). After a few months, there has been a change in companions, and the older guy shows up with a different newly wed companion who has just moved into the ward. Rinse and repeat.

]]> Comment on Washings and Anointings - Temple Education Series by Tonette Shilleh http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/04/washings-and-anointings-temple-education-series/comment-page-1/#comment-141 Tonette Shilleh Tue, 15 Jun 2010 09:08:27 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=461#comment-141 Education is unquestionably a vital field, because every thing in civilization relies upon education. I saw that on a website someplace -- a non-profit organization in the Philippines. Teachers gives their very best at their craft (the majority of them, anyway). But there are some who appear to have a gift to inspire. My high school world history teacher was one of those. She had lived in China as a kid. When she taught in Rockville, Maryland, you could actually feel the wisdom of all her experience. She didn't have us memorize dates. Which had been the first brilliant thing I had been told by a history teacher. What she said next took the subject several magnitudes higher in value. She wanted us to be familiar with the motivations of history -- the deeply visceral, human issues with what can somewhat be a deadly dry subject. Jaime Escalante of "Stand and Deliver" fame, dared to dream big. Calculus for the typically dropout crowd? Pushing them to go on to college? Wow. And I've this book called, "Calculus Made Easy," by Sylvanus P. Thompson, first published in 1910. It's been through lots of printings all to generate a straightforward subject simple. What are we able to do to create more teachers who inspire world-changing superiority? Einstein once revealed that imagination is much more important than knowledge. Knowledge can present you with the inspiration. Imagination usually takes you to the stars. Don't our children deserve better? Education is unquestionably a vital field, because every thing in civilization relies upon education. I saw that on a website someplace — a non-profit organization in the Philippines. Teachers gives their very best at their craft (the majority of them, anyway). But there are some who appear to have a gift to inspire. My high school world history teacher was one of those. She had lived in China as a kid. When she taught in Rockville, Maryland, you could actually feel the wisdom of all her experience. She didn’t have us memorize dates. Which had been the first brilliant thing I had been told by a history teacher. What she said next took the subject several magnitudes higher in value. She wanted us to be familiar with the motivations of history — the deeply visceral, human issues with what can somewhat be a deadly dry subject. Jaime Escalante of “Stand and Deliver” fame, dared to dream big. Calculus for the typically dropout crowd? Pushing them to go on to college? Wow. And I’ve this book called, “Calculus Made Easy,” by Sylvanus P. Thompson, first published in 1910. It’s been through lots of printings all to generate a straightforward subject simple. What are we able to do to create more teachers who inspire world-changing superiority? Einstein once revealed that imagination is much more important than knowledge. Knowledge can present you with the inspiration. Imagination usually takes you to the stars. Don’t our children deserve better?

]]> Comment on The Need For a Talisman by Cliff the Wino http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/04/the-need-for-a-talisman/comment-page-1/#comment-113 Cliff the Wino Thu, 15 Apr 2010 06:20:18 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=435#comment-113 Thank you, Mick. I'm not in the Moron Church Department of Revenue, but I'm pretty sure I know what their answer will be, and that is "Yes" it is very likely that a talisman can help you avoid being arrested for bank robbery and fraud, and also a talisman can cause you to win the lottery. Please begin paying nine percent of your gross income to the Moron Church immediately to qualify for these blessings. Thank you, Mick.
I’m not in the Moron Church Department of Revenue, but I’m pretty sure I know what their answer will be, and that is “Yes” it is very likely that a talisman can help you avoid being arrested for bank robbery and fraud, and also a talisman can cause you to win the lottery. Please begin paying nine percent of your gross income to the Moron Church immediately to qualify for these blessings.

]]> Comment on The Need For a Talisman by Mick http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/04/the-need-for-a-talisman/comment-page-1/#comment-112 Mick Thu, 15 Apr 2010 05:01:18 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=435#comment-112 Is there a talisman for winning the lottery? Is there a talisman for winning the lottery?

]]> Comment on The Need For a Talisman by Mick http://www.moronchurch.com/main/2010/04/the-need-for-a-talisman/comment-page-1/#comment-111 Mick Thu, 15 Apr 2010 05:00:09 +0000 http://www.moronchurch.com/main/?p=435#comment-111 What about things like bank robbery and fraud, etc. How much does it cost to buy a talisman for those crimes? What about things like bank robbery and fraud, etc. How much does it cost to buy a talisman for those crimes?

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